


Trust me

by whereJIJisalive



Category: Revenge (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-01
Updated: 2013-12-03
Packaged: 2017-12-31 04:12:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1027093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whereJIJisalive/pseuds/whereJIJisalive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the morning after Nolan and Patrick's second hook-up. Nolan reflects on his past partners and his misplaced trust in them, and wonders where Patrick will fit into his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was written after Control was aired.
> 
> There is seriously not enough Revenge fanfic, so I kind of had to contribute something. Nolan is one of my all-time favorite characters, in anything, and I've been wanting to write a fic with him for a long time. I hope I did him justice.
> 
> Translation into Chinese by alantictime here: http://tieba.baidu.com/p/2772037959  
> Translation into Spanish by LoversByHaters here: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10182073/1/Trust-Me
> 
> Thanks so much!

Trust was something that came easily to Nolan. Inherently, he wanted to see the good in people, despite whatever bad aspects that were also there. He guessed this trait of his could explain how he had come to actually care for someone like Tyler, and also how blind he had been to Padma's ulterior motive.

Of course he wasn't comparing the two. It was impossible. The little evil Padma had in her heart had been overshadowed by so much good, or at least it would have been had it been given the chance. No, he blamed his trusting nature for his relationship with Tyler, and he blamed it for Padma's death. 

How could he trust someone again? How? He was - as he'd once said - life's pawn, misery adorning him like an ill-fitting suit. He wanted to trust Patrick, because trusting people was what he did. But the truth was, the only person he could trust was Emily. Once or twice, she had betrayed him, but she would never do that if she didn't know that he'd come out safely the other end.

They were family, or at least the closest to family that either of them would ever find. And he loved her. Sometimes like a sister, sometimes more. He was aware that their pseudo-incestual relationship was both symbiotic and parasitic, but that didn't diminish his love for her in the slightest. Without her he would still be drifting. Crazy as it may sound, she was his rock. Through the storm that was his life, including all the misery, she was the only constant. He liked to think that he was about the same to her, but that was a conversation they were never likely to have, and so his opinion and his love were strengthened simply by… trust. Strangely that was a word he could never quite escape from.

So when Patrick asked him, on the morning of their second night, why there were no pictures on the walls and no memorabilia in sight, Nolan found himself tongue-tied. They were lying naked in his bed, and Patrick's hand was making patterns on his back.

"I guess I don't have many things I'd like to be reminded of every time I walk through the house," he said, opting for some sort of honesty.

"You must have some," Patrick murmured. 

"Not really," Nolan smiled bitterly. Something in him wanted to tell Patrick everything, but he couldn't do that, especially not this early on. Maybe not ever, seeing as this was Victoria Grayson's son.

"What about you and Emily? Apparently you're pretty close."

"And I wonder who told you that," Nolan muttered and fixed his lover with a look.

"What? I can't talk to my mother?"

"I don't think I need to tell you that your mother and I aren't on the best of terms."

"She makes enemies easily," Patrick said, tugging him closer. "Often without good reason. Something you need to know about me is that I don't let my family decide what I do. And I don't let them dictate who I'm interested in." He pressed a kiss to Nolan's shoulder blade, before moving upwards to the back of his neck.

Nolan's pulse started quickening. "I don't approve of everything Emily does," he said honestly, trying to finish the conversation. "But she's the only family I have." He turned around in the other man's arms, suddenly being straddled by  possibly the hottest guy he'd ever had in his bed. 

"Then I will give her a chance," Patrick said before lowering his mouth to Nolan's and doing his best to make him beg. The last coherent thought Nolan had before letting himself go was that maybe this was also the _best_ man he'd ever had in his bed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This disregards canon after Control.

Patrick had just left. Emily was on her way over. Nolan was nervous. He knew she would be able to see that someone else had been here(she would be able to see it on _him_ ), and he wasn't about to lie about who it was. This would certainly cause a few problems, seeing as Patrick was more or less her enemy, or at least he could be if he took a wrong step somewhere along the line. Maybe it was best to just tell her as soon as she arrived. 

"Nolan?"

 _Here we go._ "In the kitchen!"

Emily appeared in his line of sight, gorgeous as always in a pair of white jeans and a colorful, form-fitting top. 

"I was talking to Aiden," she began, barely looking at him as she plucked out the orange juice from the fridge and poured it into a glass. "You won't believe who sabotaged the car, I knew he was bad news from the onset." She set down the glass and turned to him, her eyes raking over him intensely. "Am I missing something?" she asked, smiling with her head cocked to the side. It was her surprised, figuring-out-what-to-do-next smile.

"Wouldn't you like to know," he winked at her, slightly fruitlessly it would seem, but what the heck - at least she hadn't been expecting it.

"You got laid," she stated. "Who?"

"So subtle, Emily," he remarked, stalling.

"You wouldn't be looking so guilty if you didn't know I'd disapprove," she said, an icy quality to her voice. Being Nolan Ross, though, he knew that this was definitely not as icy as Emily Thorne could get. "So who?" she finished.

"Patrick," he admitted, applying his trademark pout.

"Of course. I should have known."

He sighed. She couldn't even give him the satisfaction of a little shock. 

"It's not a good idea, Nolan," she said while Nolan mimed along. In this moment she truly felt like an annoying big sister to him.

"It certainly looked like a good idea last night."

"Well, it wasn't." Emily said firmly. "Nolan. He was the one who caused the crash."

Nolan's head whipped up. He hurried to swipe his hair out of his eyes. "What?"

"Your new _lover_ killed reverend Paul and single-handedly botched the best shot we've ever had of finally ending this."

Nolan looked down on his hands and gripped the kitchen counter to stop them from shaking. He should have known. It was Victoria's son they were talking about. He should have known. And even if he didn't, he should have known simply because this was what always happened when he met someone.

"You're going to have to get rid of him. I'm sorry," Emily said, her voice softening.

Nolan sighed and turned back to her. 

"Whatever," he muttered, rolling his eyes. "So, um, what service does her ladyship require to further the revengenda today?" and just like that, a mask slipped into place. By silent agreement, neither of them broached the subject again that day.

 

**

 

He didn't know how he was going to do this. How could he break things off with Patrick without telling him what he knew? How could he do anything but lie through his teeth? Nolan could lie, sure, when it came to contracts and clients and whether or not he'd eaten today. But he couldn't lie to someone who knew him intimately. It was like they had been given a password to get into his mind and body, and he couldn't take it back. 

Which is why he didn't manage to say anything to Patrick when he arrived. They ended up having sex again. He was lying in his lover's arms, wishing things were different. He suspected he had entered the negotiating state, because all he could think about was trying to find a way that would allow him and Patrick to continue seeing each other. The other man was spooning him, his arms warm and strong around Nolan. 

"Is everything okay?" Patrick asked. "You seem tense."

"I am," Nolan sighed. This wasn't the best position to have this conversation in. He was already extremely distracted by the feel of Patrick's bare back against his.

"I know what you did," he mumbled, not actually meaning to.

"Excuse me?"

Nolan removed himself from the embrace and sat up cross-legged on the bed, the sheet covering his crotch. "I'm a hacker," he tried to explain without giving anything away. "I know my way around a security system log."

Patrick looked slightly terrified. 

"I won't… tell anyone," Nolan said. "But I can't guarantee that there won't be others who will."

"What do you mean?" Patrick asked, defensive now.

"I mean, if _I_ could find this information, other people can too. People who won't be so sympathetic." He tried to make it not sound like a threat, but he felt like he wasn't succeeding. Maybe it was for the best. Patrick would storm out and Nolan could get on with his life.

Patrick was silent for a minute. "So… are we getting past this? Can you forgive me?"

"That's what you're focusing on?" Nolan asked, astonished. Patrick didn't react to anything like Nolan predicted. It was unsettling. And quite thrilling.

"Yeah, I mean, I'm not sorry for trying to get rid of Grayson. He's a jerk. He's been a jerk to my mother all of their married life and I'm pretty certain he's done a lot worse to people than what I tried to do to him."

"Well you're right about that," Nolan mumbled, rolling his eyes.

"But I am sorry about the priest. God, Nolan you have no idea," he buried his head in his hands for a while, and Nolan was only filled with the overwhelming urge to hold him. This was not how it was supposed to go. He sighed and took his lover into his arms, kissing his temple and letting Patrick cling to him for a bit.

"You know what?" he said, his heart having made a decision without consulting his brain. He couldn't do this. Screw Emily and her revengenda. He would continue to help her, of course, but he could do that without letting her make Patrick a pawn in her little game. And he was about done being the pawn himself. "You're going to get through this, Patrick, and you're never going to do something like this again. Right?"

"I would never," Patrick mumbled against his shoulder.

Nolan found that he believed him. "Then _we're_ going to get through it too. Okay? Because I've never felt like this about anyone and I'm not about to let it go."

Patrick took a deep breath and pulled back from his embrace. He laid a hand against Nolan's cheek carefully, as if Nolan was going to break. "I have known you for a week and you're already the most important person in my life, with the exception of Victoria."

Nolan would have made a joke about ending up second to Victoria Grayson with his own boyfriend, but didn't feel like it was exactly the time(It could wait until later).

"And I have no idea how that happened. But it has happened," he smiled. "You can trust me, Nolan. I promise."


End file.
